Easy English Short Stories Funny for Esl
funny short stories for esl students
Here are a few questions to ask:
Here are some essential questions for your students to discuss:
In the first method, I will introduce the lesson and the themes, and then study the new vocabulary. This can be done in many ways. I like to give the students the meaning (written and spoken) and use several visual aids to get the meaning and context across.
Shortbread Stories is again not specifically targeted at ESL students, but the range of subject matter, length and difficulty make it a great resource for any classroom. The stories are ranked by popularity, and the length of the text is clearly listed. This website has more than 1,000 funny short stories, and thousands more non-funny short stories.
Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife, please sanction me one-week leave."
Funny Short Stories! In this stressful and tired life, we people seeking some relaxation and funny things which may help us to relax. We're going to line-up the best 12 funny stories in English…
So LRRH goes though the forest, happily, picking flowers for grandmother as she goes. But. of course, in the story there is a wolf. Now a wolf, W-O-L-F is an animal. Wolves, notice the plural is different, W-O-L-V-E-S. Wolves used to be wild, all over Europe, but they're pretty rare nowadays. You'll find them in Canada though. So basically, it's the animal that all dogs are descended from. Wolves are fierce and they will eat you, if they get chance. But they're also very beautiful. Of course, the wolf in a fairy tale is always the bad guy. The wolf in a fairy tale is the symbol of all that is bad. Sometimes in a fairy tale it's a fox that's the bad guy, but more often a wolf. So the wolf starts a conversation with LRRH, and he's usually quite charming and polite on the surface, just to make him more frightening, more scary. 'Good morning, my dear! And where are you going on this fine morning?!' says the wolf. And so on. What happens next, is that the wolf finds out where LRRH is going – and he makes sure that he gets there first. He leaves LRRH in the wood and goes very quickly to the grandmother's house. The story varies somewhat at this point – that means that there are different versions. In some, we find out later that he's put grandmother into a cupboard. In other versions of the story, grandmother manages to hide under the bed. In the older versions of the story, certainly the ones I was told, when I was a little girl – the wolf has eaten grandmother. And by the time LRRH arrives at grandmother's cottage, she's already INSIDE the wolf! But because it's a children's story, grandmother isn't dead – somehow she survives this! The Grimm Brothers, that's G-R-I-M-M, the Grimm Brother's versions of the fairy stories are usually a bit more horrifying, a bit more shocking like this!
So course, the wolf puts on grandmother's bonnet. So a bonnet, B-O-N-N-E-T is another type of hat, that old ladies would have worn a long time ago. So another covering for your head. Great vocabulary for you in this Short Stories for ESL Students – remember 'a hood' is attached to your jacket and goes over your head and 'a bonnet' is what an old lady might wear! Anyway, the wolf also puts on grandmother's glasses – her spectacles – the things she uses to be able to see. So LRRH arrives at grandmother's house and comes to see her grandmother in the bedroom. Strangely, and because it's a fairy story, LRRH doesn't recognise that it's the wolf lying in grandmother's bed. But the conversation between them in the story is always the same. LRRH suspects something is wrong, something is not as it should be. 'What big eyes you have grandmother!' says LRRH. And the wolf replies 'All the better to see you with!'. And then LRRH says 'What big ears you have, grandmother!' And the wolf says 'All the better to hear you with!'. Then LRRH says 'Grandmother, what big teeth you have!' And it is at this point that the wolf reveals himself. 'All the better to eat you with!', says the wolf and he jumps out of bed and chases LRRH, clearly wanting to eat her.
Mixed Drink
A girl goes into a bar.
She says, "Bartender, give me a triple Jack Daniel's."
He gives her a triple Jack Daniel's, and she belts it down. She has five more in a row, belts them all down, passes out dead drunk, and everybody in the bar fucks her.
The next night, she walks into the bar, and says, "Bartender, give me a triple Jack Daniel's."
He gives her a triple Jack Daniel's, and she belts it down. She has five more in a row, belts them all down, passes out dead drunk, and everybody in the bar fucks her again.
The next night, she walks into the bar and says, "Bartender, give me a triple Tequila."
He says, "I thought you drank Jack Daniel's."
She says, "Not any more. Jack Daniel's makes my pussy sore."
Monkey
A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's drinking, the monkey jumps all around the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them. Then grabs some sliced limes and eats them. Then jumps onto the pool table, grabs one of the billiard balls, sticks it in his mouth, and to everyone's amazement, somehow swallows it whole.
The bartender screams at the guy "Did you see what your monkey just did?"
The guy says "No, what?" "He just ate the cue ball off my pool table-whole!"
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy. "He eats everything in sight, the little bastard. Sorry. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." He finishes his drink, pays his bill, pays for the stuff the monkey ate, then leaves.
Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and has his monkey with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again. While the man is finishing his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it. The bartender is disgusted.
"Did you see what your monkey did now?" he asks.
"No, what?" replies the guy. "Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his butt, pulled it out, and ate it!" said the bartender.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy. " He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he swallowed that cue ball, he measures everything first. "
Resources:
http://www.fluentu.com/blog/educator-english/esl-funny-short-stories/
http://www.eslbuzz.com/10-funny-english-conversations/
http://adeptenglish.com/2019/07/08/short-stories-for-esl-students/
http://www.studyflight.ru/humour/funny-stories.shtml
http://thefunnybeaver.com/15-really-funny-short-stories/
Source: https://languageskillsabroad.com/funny-short-stories-for-esl-students/
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